How to Come Back After an Injury

I have been living between New York City and Philadelphia for nearly 2 months at this point. And while I am still working hard on finding stable teaching and choreographic work, it has allowed me plenty of time to ease myself back into shape with my favorite NYC ballet teacher, Nancy Bielski, as well as trying some new instructors and dance styles (I just tried Gaga at the Mark Morris Dance Center) to expand my scope of the scene up here. While I have been getting a great many questions about what I'm auditioning for or where I am performing, I've found it nearly impossible to explain my situation. In fact, I don't really know what my situation is and where the performing part of my career is leading me. For a long time, I tried to force myself back into shape after suffering such a severe injury in Oakland nearly 2 years ago. At times, I went about this in the appropriate ways. But at other times, even with 13 years of dancing professionally behind me, I fell down a path that was not most conducive to repair. I found it difficult to appropriately strengthen a body damaged by years of wear and tear and a mind weakened by too many daunting situations in too short a period of time.

The inspiration for this post? The other day I found that one of my former students had posted three photos of herself on her Facebook account. Initially, I was cheerful to see this talented student posting some photos. But I quickly realized that these images, which included big jumps and extreme extensions, had been taken only one day after returning from nearly 6 months off due to injury. Granted, this student is a child, I was mortified to think that she had spent so much time off in order to return healthy to dance and out of pain. Whether she was motivated to post these photos online out of excitement or ego, I'm actually glad that this happened. Not only did this allow me to intervene to keep this dancer on the right path. It reminded me that I (ripe into my 30's) have committed such acts of excitement, even if I didn't post images of it online.

There is no guidebook for returning from an injury. Every injury is different and every person's body will react differently to therapy, conditioning, and exercises. But what I have learned is that there is truly an appropriate way to come back from a long-term injury. After your doctor has given you the OK to return to class, you must resist the urge to jump into class full force. Getting the green light to return to dance doesn't mean that the work of recovery is over. It means that you are in a safe place to start producing the building blocks of your technique.

My "barre" at the gym

After getting approval to start taking class again last May (after nearly a year off from taking full class), I started things off correctly. I feel that there is often a lot of pressure to take another's class the first few times that you start executing your plies and tendus. Not everybody is like me, but I always feel pressure to follow the instructors combinations to the T. Now, as a professional, I may alter a few things in class, I still tend to do things that I shouldn't be doing if I am taking somebody's class. For this reason, my first week back to class I prefer to find a space either in a studio, gym, or at home where I can start with some simple plies, tendus, and jetes. I focus this first week on remembering what it feels like to pull my inner thighs together, to support my spine with my core muscles, and beyond. By the end of this first week, I may progress to rond de jambes. But I am reluctant to push too fast, too soon because I want to remain healthy.

Posing for Instagram, but only working up to tendus this day

Once my first week has passed, I take a day or two off and continue to build on the structure of class. I add rond de jambe, rond de jambe en l'air, fondu, adagio, frappe, and grand battement exercises at a rate of one new exercise per day. If I feel that I need more strength, I may repeat a combination twice or refrain from moving forward to a new exercise until I feel ready. I try to resist the urge to add two combinations at a time. Again, this is all about building blocks. I focus on executing exercises properly with the correct muscle groups versus forcing my way through combinations without noting what muscle groups are initiating action. I know a great many dancers that move too fast in their progression towards being in shape, and what happens is they execute exercises using the incorrect muscles. Not that they don't know which muscles they should be using, but they haven't built enough strength in the right ones to avoid gripping superficial muscles. This often causes new pain or injury. At this point, feel free to enter somebody's classroom, but be sure to tell them that you are recovering from an injury. For me, I still like to work up to this point by myself, away from the pressure of any watching eyes. Keep in mind that it is completely appropriate to start adagio with your working leg at 45 degrees or to only perform fondu or frappe on flat for some time. Give yourself a pass at judgement and offer yourself some empathy towards health.

At this point, now that I can complete barre to a degree, I feel comfortable to finally enter a classroom. Again, after speaking with the teacher before class starts, I feel more at liberty to do things on my terms. For the next few weeks, I work my way towards jumps. Sometimes, I add one combination a day. Sometimes, I choose to only execute combinations like adagio once to allow my body to acclimate. The biggest part of this return game is to make sure that I am pushing myself along my own schedule without holding back everywhere because of fear or pushing too quickly out of impatience or excitement.

I am mostly reluctant to take any dance classes outside of the genre of ballet during my recovery period due to the structure provided by ballet class. Most classes in contemporary, jazz, musical theatre, hip hop, and beyond begin with a warm-up in center, followed by technique exercises and choreography. The structure of a ballet class gives you something to hold on to for starters (barre), a period of time between each exercise to analyze how your body is responding to information, and an easy opportunity to bow out when you have reached your maximum. Dance classes in other genres, at the beginning of a recovery period, can make it difficult to gauge when and where to stop and can potentially prolong recovery or result in new injury.

After I have progressed past center, I spend the most attention coddling my jumps. Throughout this past recovery period, I began to get in shape and then fell off the wagon due to my Core-ography project, traveling for work, and a lack of classes that inspired me. Now that I am in New York and back on track, it has taken me nearly one and a half months to finally finish class. Strength for jumps is the first thing to disappear after a long period off. And since there are so many different things involved in launching yourself into the air and because it is the end of class when your muscles are tired, jumps are the last thing to build back up. The last thing you want to do is jump straight into saut de chats or other large jumps, feel great on the way up, and realize that you don't have the strength to slow down the force of gravity in your landing. TAKE YOUR TIME. Perhaps, start doing a few combinations holding onto the barre. Then, progressively move forward at your own pace. This time around, I spent nearly two weeks only working through petite allegro.

One of the biggest issues in recovery is excitement to get back in class. Whether you missed moving your body, you are responding to end of class adrenaline, or you just can't let go of that ego, don't wait for the instructor to stop you or, worse, your body. Be reasonable and keep your long-term goals in sight. Dancing feels amazing for the mind, body, soul, and ego. But nothing creates more emotional injuries than a continuous stream of physical ones. As I continue to work myself back into what I consider performance shape, when people ask me what I'm auditioning for or where I'm performing I tell them this. I am getting back in shape for me and so that I can fully show my choreography when creating and instruction when teaching, since this is what I'm focusing on. If I feel healthy enough to perform again, then so be it. But this time, I'm getting in shape for me. Not for my ego. Not for the applause of live audiences or for likes on social media. Now that I finally have access to the tools to potentially perform again, I'm pacing myself and doing things on my body's terms and in my own time.

Working on some choreography at the gym

 (Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bkerollis/)

8 Way to Renew Your Inspiration

Whether you are dancing in a full-time company or have taken to running your career on your own as a freelancer, there will be times that you may feel like you are losing your motivation. Sometimes, it can be a slow period when it comes to casting and, at other times, it can be the challenge of finding inspiring work. There are many experiences throughout a dancer's development that can push oneself off track to enjoying a sustained and successful career. Often, dancers just need a new perspective or experience to get them on the right track to building and growing their passion. Below I've listed a handful of ways that I have given my dance career motivation a shot in the arm.

- Youtube:

One of the best innovations to change the dance world was the creation of Youtube. Now, I know that this social media platform which focuses on short videos was never meant to specifically work as a venue for dance, but it has surely changed people's access to quality dance footage. When I was a kid, if I wanted to seek inspiration, I either had to raid my dance teacher's video cabinet or look at still pictures of dancers in periodicals. Today, if I want to see an inspiring performance or check out a specific artist, but don't have the money to pay for tickets or travel, I can easily search for the most inspiring performances online.

- Mentors:

Climbing mountains w/close friend & mentor, Boyd Bender

One thing I know for sure is that I would never have had a career if it weren't for a handful of very special adults that took interest in offering me opportunities and advice in my journey from pre-professional to professional. While I am now a full-fledged adult and completely in charge of my own career, when times get hard I know who to turn to. Maybe it was your first dance teacher, a former dancer, a former colleague, a random arts connection you met at a donor party, or a multitude of other people. These people are often the best to turn to for inspiration, as they probably have inspired you many times in the past.

- See a show:

This one can be tricky. A few months ago, a friend asked me if I was going to see a certain performance. I told them, "No. Being injured and seeing a show would probably only be depressing." Well, a few weeks later, I finally decided to see a dance performance and was really glad I had done so. Very few dancers were inspired to have a career without having seen some type of professional performance. If you are feeling a little uninspired, dress up, grab a drink, and go be a spectator in the audience. It may help you find the inspiration you are looking for. 

- Take class from a new teacher:

Sometimes, a lack of inspiration is purely situational. This can happen a lot when you are dancing in a full-time company, taking from the same instructors all the time. When I was a kid, I used to take class from multiple teachers a week. Then I would leave for the summer and have a whole new set of teachers. Add in master classes, summer program auditions, and pre-performance warmups, I had a variety of options to take class. Often, in a company, the instructor options are very few, especially if you live outside of New York City. Many dancers won't leave company class because they are afraid that the Artistic Staff will think that the dancer isn't taking class. If you don't live in New York City, where it is common to go to Steps on Broadway to warm up for your day, do some research about instructors and classes offered in your area. If you are concerned about your boss being upset, maybe try out their class on a day off. Often, a dancer only needs a new perspective to gain new inspiration.

 - Hang out with dance friends:

If inspiration is lacking, sometimes you need to be reminded of who you are. There is no better way to do this than to spend some time with friends who are involved in and equally passionate about your art form. Whether you are sitting and talking about dance or just enjoying the energy of other artists around you, your friends will understand and inspire you to continue growing.
  
- Take class in a new style:

When dancers are students, they often dabble in a multitude of different dance styles. As a youth, I remember thoroughly enjoying differing styles of dance, like Salsa, Flamenco, African, Hip Hop, Irish Step and more. Then we become professionals and we tighten up greatly. One thing I have found, as a pro, is that once we become very good in a niche of our art, we become afraid to step out of that niche and do something that we aren't as good at. Young students have no problem throwing themselves into a class and looking/feeling imperfect. But professional adult dancers tend to stay in their own style and fear looking bad in another. Well, give that up and run to a dance studio to take a hip-hop class or a salsa class. New inspiration is rarely found on a one-way road that you drive down day after day.

- Visit New York City:

This may not be a possibility if you are on a tight budget or live too far away, but a nice visit to New York City is often enough to light that fire that every dancer feels when they visit the Dance Capitol of the World. A few weeks ago, when I was having a less than inspiring time trying to figure out my injury, I hopped on a bus to spend a few days in this amazing city. Almost every professional dancer has some connections here. You can accomplish essentially every topic listed in this post in a short trip. Walk around, feel the vibe, see a show, take from a new teacher, try a new style, hang out with dance friends, and so much more. A trip to New York City is like drinking a few shots of espresso all at once!

- Take a few weeks off:

If all else fails, maybe you just need to take a few weeks off from your art. If you don't have the funds to do this, either start saving or ask around for random, small jobs (Task Rabbit, Craigslist, friends&family, etc.) that may be able to support you so you can take that break. Don't take a few weeks off without a plan to reenter the dance world because it may lead to more time off than you planned, which may be more damaging to this cycle. Plan how you will occupy some of your time and don't put the physical and mental stress that dancers are known to place upon themselves. If you do this appropriately and effectively, you'll come back hungry for more. As they say, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

12 Reasons Dance is My Religion

For some reason, the holidays always put me in the mood to make lists. Best and worst lists of the past year, lists of things I'm thankful for, and lists of my hopes and wishes for the coming year. Well, I'm not going to resist that urge this Christmas. I am a Jew living in heavily Christian country, so I tend to love celebrating both holidays. And since Chanukkah is officially over on this here Christmas morning, I have decided to create a list in honor of the 12 days of Christmas. Since I am not really religious at all, and I appreciate celebrating all types of holidays, I have decided to create a list with a twist. With all of that said, I bestow upon you the 12 reasons dance is my religion.

1. Dance has been a part of my life since I was a very young age. When I was 2 years old, I kept running into my sister's dance class. After a few frustrating interruptions, the instructor of the class saw an opportunity. Instead of reprimanding the parent of the child, she invited me to stay in class if I could behave. And I did. From that young day of my life on, I have been immersed in the ways and the morals of dance.

This little boy couldn't stay out of his sister's dance class

2. Walking into a dance studio every day is like walking into a place of prayer. Every morning, I begin my morning ritual of plies, tendus, jetes, and beyond. Or, in a non-religious sense, plies are like my morning coffee and the rest of barre is like my breakfast.

3. Even my every day activities are ruled by dance. I think before anything that I do, "How will these activities affect my dancing." Exercise, risky activities (skiing, rollerskating, horseback riding, etc.), drinking with friends, sleep, etc.

Maria Chapman - So inspiring

4. Those people that I hold in highest esteem are my mentors and fellow colleagues that are professional dancers. I don't worship these people, per se, but I have more respect for them, their work ethic, and their inspiration than most anybody else.

R&J (Lucia Rogers) w/Fort Wayne Ballet (Photo: Jeffrey Crane)

5. When going through a difficult experience, I turn to dance to express myself, heal my wounds, and fill myself with joy.

6. While many religions learn the basis of their faith from ancient scripture, a great deal of learning is taught through oral tradition that has been passed on through the generations. Dance, like religion, is one of the last traditions that is almost completely passed on orally and ritually from generation to generation.

7. I give all my glory to my art!

8. No place on earth is more sacred than a stage or a studio.

9. Just like the holiday season brings families together in the name of religious events, ballet brings dancers together for something special every time they begin preparing for a performance. I have always felt a warm holiday-like bond by the end of a performance series.

Returning to Rochester City Ballet's Jessie Tretter for Nutcracker 2013 (Photo: Josephine Cardin)

10. I have an ongoing joke that I am going to create a religion called, "Exercism," or the religion of exercise. It would be a glorious religion! It makes you feel good, it treats your body and soul well, it inspires people to do good, and makes us all-around better people. Cheers to Exercism!!!! (I joke)

11. Just like there are multiple sects of religions, there are multiple sects of dance. Ballet has classical, neo-classical (Balanchine), and contemporary ballet. You can even break down these forms into smaller denominations; like Vaganova, Cecchetti, Bournonville, French school, Royal Academy of Dance, etc. Non-ballet sects have spanned from modern to post-modern, tap, jazz, contemporary, and beyond. While some followers of these sects of dance only hold values for their one form of dance, dancers display the most inspirational openness to joining and sharing in other forms of dance. In the spirit of collaboration, exploration, and growing one's idea of dance, most dancers are open to crossing into other belief systems of dance. If only we could experience this in religions across the world...

12. Even if I turned my back on dance, it will always be there waiting to accept me back with open arms.

Guesting in my home dance school's Nutcracker last year (Photo: Marla Kaine)

I'd like to wish all of my readers a happiest of holiday seasons!

Working with what you have

Just a little view into my everyday life. Yesterday, I had rehearsal for a dance film that I am taking part in, which I can't talk much more about without consent. But, that is besides the point. I wanted to save a little money/sleep in yesterday. So, I planned to wake up and head on over to the gym to give myself a good stretch and barre, with a hint of center work. I don't know why, but I am always convinced that I don't remember the time of rehearsals/classes. So, I am constantly going back to emails and websites to make sure that I am not missing anything. Well, I checked the gym schedule to make sure that the studio I use to warm up in would be available and this time my paranoia actually worked to my advantage. There was a class starting in less than a half hour, which would leave me no time to warm up. So, class at home it was.

Stretching on the kitchen counter

I am lucky enough that my partner and I have an apartment with hardwood floors and that our bedroom has enough space that I can at least extend my legs in most directions (depending on the angle that I stand) without hitting anything. So, I started off stretching in the kitchen and living room, as it has the most wall space and surfaces that are at a good height for me. Once I felt stretched enough, I headed into the bedroom to get on with my warm-up class.

Once in the bedroom, I set up my computer which has ballet class music loaded onto it (that was generously given to me by my friend Rachel, who is a Philadelphia-based freelance dancer and teacher). I really enjoy using these particular CD's, as many of the tracks are lengthy and there are enough to give you multiple speed options for each combination. I have a few combinations that I always perform when I am warming myself up, but I make sure that I always change up combos beyond those 3 or 4. Even though I am giving myself my own class, I don't want to get bored or only work the same muscles over and over again. I also try my best to create combinations that wont let me slack. I try to add a different balance after every other combination to make sure that my standing leg is always strong. I feel creating a solid base to work on is the most important thing as a dancer. Lastly, I always skip grand battements when I am warming up at home. I have enough space to move around without kicking things if I am moving slowly and can gauge where my legs are going, but I don't want to risk hurting myself by quickly throwing my legs into the air. Often, I will do a few combinations away from barre work that mostly involve tendues and balancing on releve to make sure that I am secure and ready for my day.

My goal is to make it into class at least 5 days a week, sometimes my rehearsal schedule starts during my first option for class. At other times, I just need to save a little bit of money and my schedule conflicts with when studios are open at the gym. For this reason, I just have to work with what I have. Warming up and maintaining my technique are very important to my body, mindset, and career. Don't think that scheduling or money have to stop you from staying in shape or preparing yourself for your workday. Stay tuned for future posts. At some point, I plan on posting a typical self-warm up ballet barre for those that need a little bit of assistance in creating combinations.

Choosing Your Home Base

My Home Base - Philadelphia, PA

Although many freelance dancers spend much of their time traveling around the world performing, most still need a place to call home. I do have a few friends that I would consider nomadic, living from friend-to-friend during their off-time. Generally, though, most freelancers need to choose a location that they can not only call home, but also a place from where they can easily conduct their business.

Choosing a location to call home is not always an option. Some dancers are just beginning their freelance careers straight out of school. This could mean that you are still living with your parents. Other dancers are employed with a full-time company and need to reside in the city where their work requires them to be. But how do you choose a place to conduct your business from if you don't have one of these factors to decide for you?

I live in Philadelphia, PA. The deciding factor for choosing Philly, for me, was not related to the fact that the city is a great place to freelance as a dancer. I, initially, moved to this city for a seasonal job. Once my time with that job had come to an end, I realized that Philly is the perfect city for me to live and work out of. Instead of creating an outright list in this post, I will tell you through my experience in this city why it is a great place for me to call my home base.

The first reason why Philadelphia is such a great place to freelance from is its location. Everybody knows that New York City is the capitol of the dance world. There are many opportunities to perform, audition, take workshops, see shows, make connections, and stay in shape in NYC. What most people don't realize is that Philly is a short 2-hour ride by car, train, or bus. I can easily get to New York on the Bolt Bus or Mega Bus for between $20 to $30 round-trip (though I prefer the Bolt Bus for its reliability and rewards program). Amtrak is also a great option, but it is not as cost effective. As we all know, NYC is one of the most expensive places to live in the US. If you don't need to be in the city every day, it could be more cost effective to live in a city close-by. My rent in Philly is much cheaper and my cost of living remains much lower. Many of my NYC dancer friends have to live in a different borough than Manhattan, where most of the dance action is taking place, with roommates in order to afford their rent. Their commute to work is usually more than an hour each way. Keeping that in mind, a 2-hour bus ride isn't much longer than the average commute for a New Yorker. Not only that, but Philly's dance scene covers most of my needs as a dancer

Another reason that Philadelphia is such a great location is its proximity along the Northeastern corridor. There is a greater amount of freelance work in the northeast due to its immense population density. It is also much easier for a company or school to bring in a guest artist if it is cheaper to get a dancer on location. Keep in mind that the less an employer has to pay for travel, the more potential they have to pay you more. I have taken a train to Providence, flown to New Hampshire, and taken the bus to New York. I am also close to an international airport with many daily flights that fly all across the country. I am more marketable by being more accessible.

Philly is also a great place to freelance out of due to the fact that it has a great dance scene. Most people aren't aware of this because the city is overshadowed by its close proximity to NYC. Aside from more established companies like Pennsylvania Ballet, Philadanco, and Koresh Dance Company, there are hundreds of small companies and projects happening around the city year-round. The city also has an annual Philly Fringe Festival with hundreds of performances spanning over a few weeks and a bi-annual event named the Philadelphia International Festival of the Arts. Not only do these festivals offer great audience experiences, but they also offer many opportunities to perform locally. Although many freelancers travel for performances, it is really nice to be able to work in the city that you call home. I often use resources like Dance USA - Philadelphia Chapter and Philadalphia Dance to keep up to date on what is happening.

Beyond performance opportunities, it is very important to have a few options available to keep in shape. One of my biggest concerns is whether or not I can find a facility that offers quality, affordable classes. By quality, I mean top-notch instruction, enough space to execute combinations, and class sizes that are appropriate. Sometimes, a dancer needs to go through a trial-and-error phase with different dance studios. I've taken classes in studios that are too small or where the instruction level is poor. I have found that there are a few great options in my city. I prefer to take classes at Koresh Dance School in Philly, as the instruction quality is high and the classes are affordable. Most organizations that offer drop-in classes will give you a professional rate that is less expensive than the regular price of classes (in NYC most places only offer a $.50 discount), so be sure to mention that you are a professional and have some sort of proof. Not every city has a listing of weekly classes, but Philadelphia Dance does compile this list of places to take open classes. When it comes to any city, though, you will have to do your research online and ask other dancers in the area. If it appears that there are no drop-in classes in your area, don't be afraid to contact a respected school or company and ask if you can join in advanced or company class. The worst they could say is no.

When choosing your home base, there are a lot of things to keep in mind. For many people, New York City comes up as the only option of places to conduct freelance dance work. It is a great option and my favorite city, but avoiding this option may be the only way to make freelancing affordable. Most of my freelancing friends live in larger cities, where there is greater accessibility to classes and transportation. Other than New York, most others live out of Philadelphia, Chicago, Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Miami. Although living in a larger city has great advantages, you may not have that option. If this is the case, make the best of the options that you have available to you. But if you are looking to relocate to a new city in order to make the most out of your freelancing career, take location, cost of living, and accessibility to your dance needs into consideration for the greatest chance at success.